You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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