walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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