So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
