i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
