One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
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