Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
