Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
