At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
