I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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