69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
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