Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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