No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
