I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
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