This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
