I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
