you're like a bully in the Christmas story
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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