i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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