Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
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