YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
