Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
this will be a night to untag.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Randomize
