ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
