This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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