Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
