She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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