i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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