I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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