Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize