Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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