the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
