So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I need to sanitize my soul.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
