were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
