Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
