I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Randomize