I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
