I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize
