Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
