she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Randomize
