It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
