Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
