im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
