If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
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