oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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