I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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