Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
