Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
