I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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