i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
