Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
