I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
These tits shall not be calmed
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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