She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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