"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
